


what, my boy, you are not weeping

by green_tea31



Series: I have loved the stars too fondly [1]
Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-10-25 02:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17716226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/green_tea31/pseuds/green_tea31
Summary: Her little boy sits up and leans towards her, looking at her intently as if he wants her to read his mind and she almost can.“It’s spinning, mom. I don’t wanna fall off.” He says as if it’s a secret he doesn’t want to share and she takes his hand.Oh, baby…“I know it does, Angus.” She leans towards him and whispers into his ear. “I feel it, too. It’s nothing to be afraid of.”That night she tells him a bedtime story about gravity.(This is the beginning, the end, and the middle in a universe where Susan Foreman fell in love with a different man)





	what, my boy, you are not weeping

**Author's Note:**

> I started this last year, wrote a few chapters and then the season three drama on MacGyver killed my muse. I'm posting this as a oneshot and first part of a series hoping that it might kick start my muse again. Expect one or two more oneshots over the next week.  
> To the Doctor Who fans: Susan Foreman's backstory is different to the one in canon and while I have done research and watched a lot of Classic and New Who over the years there will be times when I get things wrong or change them to fit into this universe, but then, it's Doctor Who, so canon is a debatable concept anyway.  
> For now this is gen (mostly, some will interpret it differently) but at some point it's going to be Mac/Jack because I'm predictable like that.
> 
> As always, self-betaed, all mistakes are my own.
> 
> Title comes from the poem "The Old Astronomer" by Sarah Williams as does the title of the series. It's beautiful and fits the theme of this perfectly.

LOS ANGELES.

_Mac’s house, after he resigns from the Phoenix Foundation._

It’s late by the time Mac gets home. He’s exhausted, physically and emotionally, and all he wants to do is go to sleep and figure out the rest of his life later. He takes a look at his phone and grimaces. Four messages from Jack, all asking him if he’s okay and if Jack should come by. Mac is tempted to answer with yes but, if he’s honest with himself, he needs to be alone right now. He loves his partner but Mac doesn’t have the emotional capacity left for a heart to heart right now.

He’s just about to dial Jack when he notices that the mail from that morning is still on the table in the living room, more specifically, he notices that among the usual mix of bills and advertising there’s a postcard he doesn’t recognize. He picks it up and takes in the picture which has a strange vintage feel to it.

Who the hell would send him a postcard from… _Nigeria?_

He turns the card over and finds nothing but his address and three lines, three lines he hasn’t heard in a very long time.

_Laugh hard_

_Run fast_

_Be kind_

MISSION CITY

_Mac is a few months old_

“He doesn’t like me.” Jim states with the conviction of a man who had to fight to even get his father in law to acknowledge his existence.

His wife, his beautiful, wonderful angel of a wife, light of his life and mother of his son, grins at him mischievously and throws him the dish towel. He starts drying the dishes while she makes faces at their son who seems to find pretty much everything hilarious these days.

“He…doesn’t _not_ like you, sweetheart. Just give him time. Once he’ll come to know you he’ll love you almost as much as I do, I’m sure.” She looks up and for a moment Jim imagines he can see the whole of space and time in her eyes and where the hell did that thought come from? The moment is over as quickly as it began and he sighs.

“That isn’t nearly as reassuring as you seem to think it is.”

“Well, dear.” She raises an eyebrow and replies almost haughtily. “It wasn’t meant to be.”

 

MISSION CITY

_Mac is four_

Mac is bored. His dad’s away and his mom is making something in the kitchen, shooing him away because Mac isn’t good with kitchens. It’s not his fault that adults don’t know how to keep him out of the rooms with the stuff he can take apart and he still thinks he could have made the toaster work better if he’d just had more time or the right tools.

Also, it’s his birthday tomorrow, so whatever his mom is making, it will be a surprise for him. Mac still isn’t sure he likes surprises all that much. His mom and grandfather are awesome at surprises but two days ago Donny told Mac he had a surprise for him in his father’s tool shed, and then he locked Mac in there in the dark.

Luckily, Mac is very good with locks or he’d have been in there much longer than he was.

He’s on the way to his room, trying to find something to do when he hears a strange, wheezing noise coming from the attic.

Mac is torn. He knows he isn’t supposed to go up there alone but he’s also incredibly curious and curious children are hard to keep out of forbidden places. Mac looks behind him. His mom is still busy in the kitchen. It won’t hurt anyone if he just has a quick look. She never has to know.

 

MISSION CITY

_Mac is three_

“I’m scared mommy.” Angus is in bed, covers up to his nose, only his eyes peaking up at her, wide and innocent and so, so precious. Her little wonder.

“Why are you scared, Baby?” She asks, smoothing down the creases in his sheets. “There’s nothing to be scared of. I’m here, you’re here, and your grandfather is here, too. And your daddy is coming home in a few hours so we will all be here and safe together.”

Her little boy sits up and leans towards her, looking at her intently as if he wants her to read his mind and she almost can.

“It’s spinning, mom. I don’t wanna fall off.” He says as if it’s a secret he doesn’t want to share and she takes his hand.

Oh, _baby_ …

“I know it does, Angus.” She leans towards him and whispers into his ear. “I feel it, too. It’s nothing to be afraid of.”

That night she tells him a bedtime story about gravity.

 

LOS ANGELES

_Two weeks ago in Mac’s living room_

Mac is trying to work up the nerve to say something, Jack can tell. His partner has a particular expression when he doesn’t want to talk about something but knows he has to. Jack usually gives Mac the time to sort himself out but this time Mac is particularly antsy about it which in turn makes Jack antsy and the general anxiety level in the room is already high enough so…

“Out with Mac. You’ve been wantin’ to tell me something. Stop trying to distract yourself and just say it.” Jack looks up from the magazine he’s been idly going through while Mac’s working on fixing the fridge, again. He should probably just buy a new one, but Jack knows Mac fixes everything until he can’t anymore – even if he has to hold it together with duct tape and glue.

Right know Mac is standing still, not working on anything and looking at Jack like a deer in headlights.

“Not sure what you’re talking about?” Mac asks unconvincingly and yeah, Jack calls bullshit on that one.

“The phone calls over the last few days? The whispering with Bozer while you thought I wasn’t lookin’ your way? Asking me if I had anything to do next weekend but not telling me why?” Jack can almost see as Mac deflates and gives in.

“Fine. You’re right.” Mac admits and pushes a hand through his hair then looks up at Jack, blue eyes strangely distant. For a moment Jack imagines he sees stars in those baby blues but shakes it off quickly.

Mac grins at him.

“There’s someone I want you to meet.”

 

MISSION CITY

_Mac is twelve_

Bozer is running, trying to keep up with Mac and wonders, not for the first time, how someone who basically spends all his free time doing experiments and blowing things up can be this fast. Bozer is no running champion but he’s at least fast enough to outrun most of their grade. Mac though…

Mac runs like the devil himself is chasing him.

“Come on, Bozer. We have to hurry or he’s gonna leave without us.” Mac yells at him and crosses a street, barely noticing the car swerving to avoid hitting the boys. That’s the other thing. Mac thinks his grandfather is going to take them on a trip but as far as Bozer knows, Harry never goes anywhere except for his and Mac’s occasional camping trips.

Mac stops next to an old diner that’s been empty for longer than Bozer and Mac have been alive and looks around frantically.

“Do you see anything?” He asks and Bozer isn’t quite sure what he’s getting at when he sees it.

There’s a strange blue box sitting in the street that he’s pretty sure hadn’t been there last week.

“You mean that thing?” Mac’s eyes light up. He walks up to the box and pulls out a key. It fits perfectly. With a flourish, Mac opens the door and holds it open for Bozer.

Well, it looks kind of small and Bozer’s pretty sure that Mac’s grandfather isn’t going to take them anywhere in that blue wooden box, but so far trusting Mac hasn’t let him down, so he takes a deep breath and walks past Mac into the dark.

_Welcome to the Tardis, Boze._

 

CAMBRIDGE, MA

_Mac is seventeen_

_He dreams about death and destruction, the boy who is not yet a man, the man who is not yet a soldier. In his dreams he sees worlds burning, hears people screaming and children crying. He dreams of a war that will never end, yet is always ending, dreams of horrors unseen and weapons so terrible the universe itself turns its gaze away. He dreams of his grandfather who is finally ready to stop running, ready to take up the mantle of soldier he has refused for so long. The boy doesn’t know it yet but soon he will fight a war himself, thinking of his grandfather who isn’t really his grandfather and of all the people of Gallifrey who never had a choice but to fight because war demands victims._

_War never changes, except for all the ways it does._

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone wants to play in this AU, be it Mac/Jack or gen, feel free just drop me a line so I can read it and shower you with affection :)


End file.
